A day in a life, my life as a stay at home mom is not sitting home watching TV or reading a book or even sitting and eating. A day in my life can have me everywhere doing everything all at once.
Currently, I am the Girl Scout leader for each of my daughter’s troops, yep that’s 2 troops. I have taken on the role for our Elementary school as the Girl Scout coordinator because no one else had. I am a board member now of our Girl Scout Service Unit. I am a board member for our school’s foundation. I am the chair for our school’s largest fundraiser, the Auction Gala that is fast approaching in early March.
Girl Scouts is currently at the start of everyone’s favorite time of the year, cookie sales! Luckily I have mom’s willing to take on pieces of the cookie manager role in each of the troops so the burden isn’t fully mine alone!
There are 24 of us volunteers helping to make our school’s Auction Gala be the best it can be. I am in the trenches alongside each of them helping to get donations, looking at ways to tweak this event in its 11th year, organizing, delegating, sharing ideas, coordinating meetings and keeping all of us in good spirits as we work our buts off!
And in the midst of this, our youngest has shared with me that she is struggling some about what family she belongs in. This is something we expected at some point to come up in her thinking and for us to talk about. I just never thought she’d only be 6!
Both our girls have only known the way our family is, formed by adoption with ongoing family relationships with their birth families. Most especially our relationships have been strongest with each of their birth mothers and their extended families. So not a surprise to hear my little talk to me about adoption and our family as it’s our everyday life, just didn’t expect this kind of struggle that she is experiencing internally.
She knows and has always known that she did not come from my tummy where babies are before they are born. She has known always that it was in the tummy of S that she grew and was loved from the start. She knows that S chose us to be her parents and for her sister to be her sister. We see S and it was right after a recent time together that my little shared what she was thinking. I felt my heart tear into little pieces. We let her share what she was feeling and tried our best to answer her.
Even with what we could answer, my husband and I think that a non-family member (therapist) versed in adoption and one who works with young children would be a better place for her to find herself and her answers. With that said I got a referral from an adoption therapist with whom my husband and I have seen and drop in to see from time to time even still.
All my juggling fell aside I thought about what she must feel like but not knowing what she must feel like. I wonder too if our older daughter has had similar thoughts but not shared them? I needed to take the time to seek out a professional that I think will be a good fit. Today I spoke with the one referred to us and I believe she will be a good fit but even still it must be a good fit for my daughter. I liked her but it is my little who must find the comfort with her to talk and share her feelings.
So as I pick back up the balls and things I juggle in place, I will add this part to help my daughter and maybe both in time.
I am forever thankful to the community we built during our journey to parenthood through adoption. It is this community I can turn to in times of need and they are there!
Do you have a community to lean on?